“As for goals, I don’t set myself those anymore. I’m not one of these ‘I must have achieved this and that by next year’ kind of writers. I take things as they come and find that patience and persistence tend to win out in the end.” -Paul Kane
Goals are rigid. Life is not. Your life is dynamic, constantly changing. Surprises happen. Don’t fight the fluid flow of your life by setting goals – set yourself themes instead.
Setting goals is hazardous to your life.
3 Reasons Not to Set Goals
- They don’t work – seriously, when was the last time you accomplished a goal exactly as planned? (*cough* New Year’s resolutions *cough*)
- They discourage – you focus on what you didn’t accomplish rather than on what you did, which discourages you from continuing to grow, change, and get results.
- They don’t fit into your life – like fitting a square peg into a circle hole, rigid goals don’t work with your fluid life.
Okay, so we shouldn’t set goals. Sounds nice. But how do you grow, make changes, and get results? If you can’t kick yourself in the butt with goals, then with what?
Instead of setting goals, set themes.
Themes Adapt to Your Life
You don’t know where your life will be a few months from now. But goals assume circumstances won’t change and will be ideal. However, themes adapt to your life.
You’ve heard your friends say, “My 5 year goal is this or that.” Yeah right. Get real. Your goal will change in like a month.
Instead of chasing an elusive goal, work on a theme instead.
You’ll still grow, make changes, and get results while working with your always-changing life.
How to Set Themes
- Choose something you’d like to work on or change in your life – become entrepreneurial, increase your income, destroy shyness and be more social, whatever.
- Make that a theme for your year – you can choose a shorter or longer period of time too, like half-a-year; decide what works best for you.
- With the theme set in place, you’ll now be conscious of your decisions and actions and work towards what brings you desired results – as you make headway, your goals and to-do list will morph, but you’ll stay on track with making progress.
For example, if your theme was to become entrepreneurial, your goals and actions will naturally change throughout the year. But the business books and seminars you learn from, the type of bank and credit card accounts you set up, the websites you build, the mindset you’ll be shifting to, and so forth will all be within the entrepreneurial theme.
You’ll be getting results while not fighting the fluid flow of your life.
Each year, set a few themes for yourself. It could be personal finance, personal development, creativity, business, or social or relationship stuff.
Be modest. Underestimate your ability. Think you can make 3 big changes in your life this year? Stick to 2 themes max. You keep it simple and manageable this way. Getting overwhelmed makes you feel like crap and nothing gets accomplished.
The themes will act as a guiding light for things you do this year. Your limitless choices are narrowed down, making it easier to decide what to do.
When you have a theme, your small goals and actions have a habit of figuring out themselves. You get what’s needed done and make progress naturally.
2 Arguments You Might Have, Answered
1. “Yo Oleg, isn’t setting themes a cop-out from not setting specific targets? You’re just being wishy-washy and not having anything concrete to work towards. How can you make any real change in your life, mate?”
A theme isn’t a cop-out of not setting specific targets. Rather, it acknowledges that your life won’t go according to plan anyway. Instead of being an all-or-nothing approach like setting goals is, setting themes will keep you going in the right direction and getting results while being ready for the unexpected.
You’ll still have specific actions and small goals that you’ll accomplish throughout the year. But those will change as you make progress, learn more, and better understand what you need to do.
But the big picture is a theme, not a goal. A theme will keep you going in the right direction without limiting you to rigid, ideal circumstances like a goal would.
2. “But Oleg, I use a goal to get my butt of my seat and make a change in my life. Even if I don’t accomplish the goal, I still got results. It’s like reaching for the stars – I use it as motivation.”
Fair enough. Use whatever works best for you. Results is what matters, not the process.
But be honest with yourself.
Rather than constantly trying to trick yourself with setting these goals, set themes instead. You’ll be getting the same results, but because you’re fulfilling your theme, you get encouraged instead of discouraged. Which can motivate you to get even more results.
Goals Discourage, Themes Encourage
Goals are all-or-nothing. If you don’t accomplish them—and you most likely won’t, at least not exactly how you set them—then you feel bad.
But you can’t not accomplish a theme. Because it’s not a concrete thing to accomplish anyway. Rather, it’s a guiding light that steers you in the right direction.
Made a lot of progress? Sweet. Made just a little? That’s still awesome. It’s more than what you had before.
When you get any results, you fulfill the theme you’ve set for yourself. You become encouraged and keep getting more results. Awesome, huh?
By Setting Themes I Got More Results
I’ve stopped setting goals for myself. I now only set themes. And I’ve gotten way more results, growth, and changes in my life because of that.
I tried setting goals in the past. And because I could never achieve them as idealistically planned, I just ended up getting frustrated and discouraged.
But by switching to setting themes, I stay on track with my actions and decisions but don’t have the all-or-nothing burden of having to exactly achieve a goal. I get results, feel great, get encouraged, and get more results.
An example: for 2009, one of my themes was to become mobile. Gear, clothing, and lifestyle-wise. I hated traveling with tons of clothes and other stuff, and wanted to lighten my load, possessions, psychological attachments to stuff, and so forth.
No goals. Just a theme of becoming mobile – I need to be able to put my life in a backpack and head out anywhere.
My guiding light was set. So when the time came to buy some clothes for the spring and summer, I immediately started looking at adventure and travel clothing.
I learned which fabrics to look at (nylon and polyester), which features they should have (quick-drying, moisture-wicking, anti-stinky). I ended up giving away most of my previous wardrobe and switching to a lighter, more functional, lighter, thinner, and comfortable set. Maximum function with minimum weight.
And because stuff like underwear could be worn for days and days without getting stinky or uncomfortable, I didn’t need as much articles of clothing. That led me to having less possessions: first with clothes, then with much of the stuff I used to own (which I got rid of). Bam. Another result achieved.
I was making change and getting results while letting my constantly-changing days flow naturally. This was possible because I didn’t have a rigid and idealistic goal, but rather a theme which guided and encouraged me.
It kept going. When an opportunity for an impromptu week-and-a-half US Virgin Islands trip presented itself, I was naturally hesitant but decided to go for it. The theme of mobility kicked me in the butt.
Saturday morning = idea generated with a friend; Saturday evening = tickets bought; Sunday = pack my few things I have into a backpack; Monday morning = leave.
I made progress in the location-independent lifestyle. And not only that, but I got out of my comfort zone and exercised my spontaneity muscle as well. Which also fits in with the mobility theme. Bam and bam.
By setting themes instead of goals, I was still able to grow and achieve results but worked with, rather than fought, the fluid flow of life. And because I was fulfilling my theme, I got encouraged to do more.
Themes are so awesome. I’m never going back to setting goals again.
Set Themes Instead of Goals
Tired of not achieving your goals you set and feeling discouraged? That’s because setting goals is hazardous to your life. Set themes instead of goals.
Themes adapt to your unpredictable, constantly-changing life. And because any relevant results you achieve fulfills that theme, you get encouraged. Which makes you want to do more.
What growth or change do you want this year? Choose a theme and let it guide your actions and decisions to achieve results (and actually encourage you to do more).
Useful Stuff Elsewhere
Kill Your Goals – Jonathan Mead on how goals hurt more than they help, and the effective alternative is to live based on principles and focus on ambitions and dreams.
